
I’m not
The season begins right where 5A left off, with Lagertha and her crew fleeing Kattegatt after the drubbing they got on the field at the hands of Ivar and his band of misfits and Franks. Lags, Bjorn and Ube hole up in the country with contraband members Heahmund and Magrethe (we’ll ask it again: how is she not dead yet?) to plan their next moves, while Ivar forces the good folk of Kattegatt to bend the knee to his tyrannical self.
Sure, hijinx abound – Ivar plans Lagertha’s gruesome slaughter, Floki narrowly escapes death at the hands of his supplicants, Heahmund unwittingly delivers his adoptive Norse clan into the custody of a surprise English king (d’oh!) – but let’s just skip to the most important thing (to me):
The Return of Le Roi
Rollo’s back and there’s gonna be troble, amirite?! He swaggers back into Kattegatt in classic Rollo style, with a bunch of snark and full of “what’s in it for me” bravado and I was all *heart eyes*!!!
He plays it cool with Ivar for a while, but then jet-sets off to find his true lady love and sweep her off her feet and plan his evil double cross against Ivar and admit to Bjorn that he’s his dad and then act all sad sack and beg Bjorn to kill him and slink away like a kicked dog and WAIT A MINUTE WHAT IS HAPPENING THIS SUCKS.
But that’s okay – totally okay – because he’s going to storm back into Kattegatt and kick Ivar’s ass in a series of vicious, violent, bloody . . . trade negotiations?

Wut.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for weakening the economic foundations of Kattegatt in order to destabilize Ivar’s illegitimate regime and bring about popular revolution to reinstall Lagertha to the throne, but what is this? Star Wars 2: Attack of the Motion to Take Punitive Action Under Advisement? No – the is Vikings! I want bloooooooood, and I want it nooooooooow!

Mmmmmm, berserky
During the Comic Con panel this summer, Clive talked about how Rollo is grappling with aging, and how he isn’t the warrior he used to be, but C’MON! If I’m able to invest in old-ass Ed Harris kicking butt around Westworld, I can handle Rollo going full-geezer on some young whippersnapper! In fact, having him work around his old in a battle against an adversary in his prime could actually be kind of awesome, case in point:
But wait a minute again! It looks Rollo has deftly set up a distraction to get Ivar out of town so Lagertha and crew can steal a ship and escape, at which point he is going to renounce his kingdom to take up arms and fight alongside his kinsman to the death! *presses earpiece* Hold on a second, no – I’m hearing he’s actually just hopping right back in his boat to feel the gentle winds tussle his locks on the the way back to Frankia . . . forever.

Aw hell [Roll]no!!!!
Anyway, I was really hoping a new and more complicated Rollo would be slipping in to fill the void this season, but things are not looking good for that right now!

#godsImissthemsomuch
Rollo or No-llo, I’m hanging in there this season, because there is still some great stuff on the horizon! Shifting allegiances, surprising betrayals, and, of course, battles! Battles! Battles! Refresh your memory of what’s to come with this epic Comic Con trailer:
See you next week!
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How did you want to see Rollo come back? What hobby should Ivar take up to get his mind off Lagertha, because he is, like, seriously obsessed? How has Magrethe not died yet? Do you think Heahmund is on the level, or is he leading Lags to her doom?