Good news Harry Potter fans! You can now register to become eligible to potentially be randomly selected to try and buy non-guaranteed tickets on a first come first serve basis for Harry Potter and the Cursed Child on Broadway. I haven’t been shy in the past about how much I dislike the storyline of Cursed Child, and even though I totally registered, because of course I did, because it’s Harry Potter, I’ve never been overly curious about the future Harry Potterverse. I’m much more interested in what happened in the past: I’m a fan of the Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them series so far, and ever since we learned more about her life story on Pottermore, I’ve thought that a Netflix-type mini-series about McGonagall would be fantastic. It’s her birthday today (born in 1935, she’s a still spry 82), which makes it the perfect day to celebrate this badass witch.
First of all, I had my suspicions that Minnie (I’m fairly certain she would not enjoy this nickname, but I’m going to use it anyway) would look killer in that mid-20th century fashion and I could not have been more right. Feast your eyes on Dame Maggie looking drop dead gorgeous.
Her tragic love affair with a Muggle? A dramatic staple. Working her way through the Ministry, then leaving it all behind to mold young minds at Hogwarts? Inspiring. Developing a close mentor- and letter friendship with Dumbledore? These are my favorite scenes already. Married later in life (to a guy name Elphinstone!), only to be hit with even more tragedy when he unexpectedly dies? I can hear the Emmy acceptance speeches. We’re all still owed from the time Pushing Daisies was cancelled after only two seasons, and this show should be what we get.
She’s the first magical character that we meet in the entire series, when she spies on the Dursley’s as a cat in the beginning of Sorcerer’s Stone, and correctly deduces that they’re the worst.
One of my favorite ever McGonagall moments appears in Chamber of Secrets, when all of the teachers call Lockhart’s bluff about knowing how to defeat the monster. But it’s our girl McGonagall who deals him the final blow. At this point everyone knows that the monster is real and think it has killed a girl, and she literally suggests that he goes down there, knowing he’ll probably die, because he’s just that irritating.
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We’ll leave you to deal with the monster, Gilderoy. Your skills, after all, are legend.
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In Goblet of Fire she was the only adult to raise the point that letting an inexperienced fourteen your old compete in a deadly competition was maybe not the best idea no matter what the rules were.
And who can ever forget her steady resistance in Order of the Phoenix, and her nonstop sass directed at that toad-faced devil Dolores Umbridge? She gave Harry cookies, too.
See also: Snape- 0, McGonagall- 1,000 points to Gryffindor.
After Voldemort was finally defeated, McGonagall became Headmistress of Hogwarts, because after an evil maniac terrorizes your world, who better to take the lead and get everyone back on course than a strong female? Take the hint, America in 2020. On this day we not only wish her the very best, but will glare sternly at any troublemakers we come across in her honor.
