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The new year is upon us, and I don’t think Team Normal is alone in breathing a bit of a sigh of relief. 2017 was…a lot. Sure, there were highs: Porgs, those new Star Wars cuties, came into our lives, Wonder Woman kicked crazy ass, and there were all the “Moonlight actually won Best Picture” memes, but on the other hand Trump is President of the United States and literal Nazis took to the streets in several big cities throughout the world. It was also the year that pretty much every man you’ve ever heard of was outed as some kind of repulsive sex goblin. Everything was so nuts that when it was announced that footage of an object in space could very well be proof of alien life, the collective reaction was a big ol’ shrug.
But as long as the world continues to spin on, and until we can hitch a ride on that aforementioned space object or take some kind of Rip Van Winkle style nap, we’ll continue to look ahead to the new year. You can look at our predictions for last year here and see how we did (so-so), and then check out what several members of our team think is going to go down in 2018.
I predict that in 2018, Warner Bros. will realize that Wonder Woman director Patty Jenkins needs to direct ALL the DC Films. I also predict that we will all see The Spy Who Dumped Me just so we can see Sam Heughan with a decent haircut. 2018 will also be the year that we all watch A Discovery of Witches, Matthew Goode will be our new bae for 2018, and I will rewatch Leap Year over and over again.
I predict that even less of Team TN will be into Outlander in 2017. I predict that A Discovery of Witches will be a big hit with some of the Outlander contingent. I predict that Sally Thorne will write the next great Contemporary Romance that makes us forget how many times we’ve re-read The Hating Game.
I predict that The Bachelor will get sued for (more) sexual harassment and/or misconduct, but I’ll still watch it for some godforsaken reason. I predict that I’ll read more smut than is doctor recommended in order to avoid the reality that is the state of our democracy. Oh and I predict that we’ll all be drinking Moscow Muellers to celebrate Robert Mueller’s successes in the months to come.
I predict that Avengers: Infinity War will make me cry at least four times, and that my obsession with Loki will finally reach a level that a mental health professional would probably refer to as “real messed up.” I predict that I will take up and then almost immediately abandon some kind of fitness routine after we watch Alicia Vikander crush it in Tomb Raider. I predict that I’ll become so obsessed with and worried about the midterms that I’ll resemble Gollum by Election Day.
2018 will be the year that Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe finally admit that they’ve totally been dating this whole time. They’ll release a joint statement and share photos of their trendy Glasgow apartment and their litter of rescued, adorably cantankerous cats. Shippers will soar on the mighty wings of righteous vindication. The “Sam Heughan is gay” camp will remain unconvinced.
HAHAHAHAHAHA keep dreaming, shippers. In all reality, I predict that with the new seasons of Victoria and The Man in the High Castle I will sink deeper into my pervy fascination with Rufus Sewell. I also predict that I’ll see The Last Jedi in theaters an embarrassing amount of times and then buy it the day it comes out on blu-ray. Not because I care about Star Wars, but because I’m deeply fascinated by the surprising and darkly erotic energy between Kylo Ren and Rey. I am here. for. it. I also predict that my husband will be totally fine with this and not ask too many questions why.
I predict that even though I set my Goodreads Reading Challenge 5 books lower than 2017, I will still be scrambling to finish 10 books in the last week of next December. This is a pretty guaranteed win since I was 8 books behind this year. I will most likely be distracted by no less than
10 5 awesome new/returning TV series – such as The Good Place, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Black Mirror, The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, Sharp Objects, You, Maniacs…I could go on – and 2 trash shows (looking at you 90 Day Fiancé and The Bachelor) that I can’t stand but somehow keep watching…
I also predict/hope that my amazing idea of Goodreads, but for TV, will be created because it is too hard to keep track of all the content that I need to watch. Let’s call it Goodwatch…or TVTracker…ScreenBaby. Idk – all I’m saying is I hope I get money/credit for this idea because I have student loans to pay off!
Oh, and I will definitely tear up and not be able to hide it when I hear that Harry Potter theme start up at the beginning of Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald. Sue me for being nostalgic, ok?
What are your 2018 predictions?!