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Dear John Krasinski,
I have loved you for a long time. More than ten years. I have a DVD copy of License to Wed. I made a girls’ weekend out of seeing Leatherheads when it came out in theaters.
As you might have surmised, I was (and continue to be) a ridiculous flan of The Office. That show made me incredibly happy, and you as Jim Halpert was almost all of the reason why. Please see: What Jim and Pam Taught Me About Shipping for a full run down of my love affair with your character.
Aside from you, I also like fantasy novels and Star Wars movies. I like regency romance and period dramas. I like Merchant Ivory and Emma Thompson. I like elves and werewolves and Harry Potter. So, look here. How dare you make me watch this Dad Show™.
The new trailer for Amazon’s Jack Ryan series aired at New York Comic Con this weekend
I love your face. I love your voice. I get giggly when I hear esurance commercials. And that affinity is going to have me spending eight hours in 2018 getting invested in CIA vs Random Yemeni Bad Guy Story, and I am a little resentful.
(I might also be a little resentful that last year at NYCC, you and I were only a table away from one another and it was beautiful, and this year I was busy and couldn’t come see you. I’m sorry. I am.)
When I think of Jack Ryan I think of long conversations with my dad trying to explain who Chris Pine is. It’s not fun. My dad is a Tom Clancy Super Fan, and he loves Patriot Games et al. Trying to explain to him how this new show will be not an adaptation but a new story reimagining the Clancy characters is just not the Tuesday night I wanted to have.
Look, I can handle spy movies. I’m a big fan of The Americans, but that’s mostly character development and Elizabeth’s silk shirts. If we are talking current events, I can handle Mr Robot because despondency fuels my hate fire for credit cards. Also, Christian Slater was on my list before you and I were out of junior high.
But I tend to steer clear of Jason Bourne-esque fare. I’ve never seen a James Bond movie. I do not care. It seems less believable to me than Elf Politics in Mirkwood.
So look what you made me do, John Burke Krasinksi. You made me write an entire piece about how I will be watching your CLANCY ADAPTATION. Lord, I can’t even type that outside of disdain font.
Feel bad, John Krasinski, and go do another The Hollars.
Yours in all things but CIA action TV,
PS Make it up to me by saying Hi on Twitter.
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