Real Quick: Sex Criminals Volume 4 Release Day!

Whether we’re talking TV shows, movie trilogies or book series, I am all about the binge. This is especially true for comics. Nothing is worse than settling in, cracking open a new issue, and barely popping the seal on my bag of Funy’uns before – BOOM – the issue is over! I want to pour me a “big ol glass a wine,”™ and get lost in a world for hours. Which is why I love the collected volumes of comics, and set very special alarms in my calendar to track release dates. And ding dong, ladies – today the long-awaited Sex Criminals Volume 4: Fourgy drops!

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For the uninitiated, Sex Criminals follows librarian Suzie, whose orgasms stop time. It seems she’s doomed to spend her post-coital hours alone with frozen partners, until a party meet-cute has her getting her rocks off with a Jon, a fellow traveler in the magical climax realm.

Prior to hooking up, the most devious activity undetaken in the frozen world was Jon stealing porn by the ton from local sex shop “Cumworld,” but when Suzie’s library hits dire financial straits the duo realizes that their power offers a solution: bank robbery. But they are able to justify their crimes, because the proceeds go to a good cause. So it’s all good, right? They embark on a course of “sex, rob, repeat,” which brings them to the attention of a rogue band of sex enforcers (led by villain “Kegelface”) determined to put a stop to their shenanigans at any cost.

In the course of eluding the anti-sex vigilantes they learn hilarious sex positions (“brimping” ftw), meet a clit-booping therapist, cross paths with a compulsive potted-plant desecrator, and meet Jon’s boyhood porn obsession, Jazmine St. Cocaine, who plays a mysterious part in their world. They also goof like crazy, are completely adorable, and fall in luuuuuuv.

*sigh*

But there’s trouble brewing at the end of Volume 3. Suzie has an attack of conscience, and is worried that without the robbing her relationship with Jon will fall apart. Jon’s therapy records have been stolen, threatening to reveal his deep dark secrets. But none of that may even matter, because Kegelface and the Sex Police have cornered Suzie and Jon, and hope of escape looks bleak.

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[Side note: I have a long history of cartoon man-crushes (one of my earliest is detailed here), and Jon pushes all of my sexy-nerd buttons: tall, dorky, hilarious t-shirt collection. Doesn’t hurt that author Matt Fraction models for Jon, because he is stupid nerd-hot:

This fucking guy

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This series is fantastic: hilarious, action-packed, really sweet, and, of course, full of sexing and criminaling. So if you are looking something to hold you until Saga Volume 8 comes out in January, pick up your copy of Sex Criminals: Fourgy here, and let the binge begin!

What comics are you reading? Who was your first cartoon crush? If you could stop time with your orgasms, what devious criminal enterprise would you undertake? Glowing dick: good to go, or hell no?

_{Sex Criminals images courtesy of Image Comics}