Time for Tom: Friday French Lessons

So it’s been ages since I’ve written a post, which is mostly because of real life job but also because I am writing a full length novel fanfiction like a madwoman (Lokane, somewhat AU; will post details when it’s ready!).  But then last night while working really late, I turned on Shakira’s “Hips Don’t Lie”, #becauseTom, and also because I needed the energy boost at 1am to get through editing boring technical documents.

After an entire evening of hanging out with Tom entirely Éponine-style, I just can’t anymore. Tom’s too much for me.

Like this:

^source

I sent this to Jamie W. and she is all, “I wanna know where he learned that phrase.” and I’m like, “I wanna know why he isn’t saying ‘You don’t have any pants, because I just panty dropped them with my eyebrows.'”  Because really, he just did. On repeated gif.

Also, I am learning French right now in my spare time* so that I can go to the French Riviera like a boss (minus the yacht, because, well, YOLO, but you don’t always have enough money during that life to buy or rent a yacht). I just finished up my lesson on clothing, and this word culotte was NOT part of it. So, I went to my trusty reverso.net for more information… Here’s what they had to say:

 

YUP. Whoever translated that gif speaks British English and pants means panties.

So, let’s look at this gif again with that in mind:

I actually imagine Tom never wears pants under his trousers (you’ve SEEN slow-mo snake hips gif, right?) because why would I imagine differently? Too many layers to pull off in my fantasies! But seriously, this guy is so much better at removing panties than any French dude I’ve met. And I have dated a French dude quite seriously before…talk about a knickerblocker!

I just can’t. I just need to rip apart that shirt he’s wearing. It really looks like it’s begging to be ripped, right? The precariously tight around the pectorals button, its threads having been under the stress of Tom’s Ray Bans all day. As Jamie W. aptly said, “It’s amazing how many emotions one gif can elicit.”  Truly it is, Jamie!

So, Tom, here’s what I have to say about that:

Yeah, I went there. How could one not?!!! #hipsdontlie

Some final Friday thoughts:

1. Is the Spanish word culo related to this French word culotte in its etymology?

2. Tom, will you please come do French lessons with me? I will let you tag along for my French Riviera trip. I am nice like that. Even if you didn’t say “I’m not wearing pants.” correctly… in the French Riviera, this simply is not a concern!  Surely you remember To Catch A Thief…

^source

3. For real, we can actually DIY Culottes (Days of the Week … um, Culottes Par Semaine? Semainier?) There’s an English version, but how will we learn French using that?!

4. I really feel like Temps pour Tom means Weather for Tom, but nothing could translate with assurance for me online. Anyone? I only studied Spanish, Catalan, and Russian!! 🙁

_{*Spare time= 10 min a day lessons! Super awesome and I love it.}