I mean, Jamie/Sam is totally worthy of endless googling on the part of the Outlander fan base, but isn’t it about time Frank got his due? Remember, Claire also married him, so he’s got to have a little something going on in the lover department, no?
So, in the interest of parity, let’s reflect on some of the reasons the OTHER Mr. Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp deserves some fan lovin’.
[As always, please note that spoilers ensue, so if you have not made it at least through Voyager, you may want to occupy your time in an alternate fashion – for example, going and finishing the series through Voyager. srsly.)Super-secret-sexy-spy
During the war, while Claire was nursing it up in France, Frank was a spy for MI-6, the British espionage agency. You know who’s MI-6 don’t you? James-freaking-Bond, that’s who!
We’re talking this:
and this
and this
So even though we don’t have much info about his work, you can bet it included blowing crap up, making witty banter over mixed drinks, beating-down some Nazis, and, of course wearing the shit out of a fedora:
Consider that hat worn!
Hot for teacher
After the war, Frank is off to Oxford to take on the role of witty, sophisticated, slightly-to-much older hot history professor. And you know how that goes! Like that time your math teacher reminded you a little too much of R-Pattz, so you doodled a million little hearts in your notebook containing your initials connected with a plus sign and a few “TLA”s thrown in for good measure. Or maybe when you noticed how the chalkboard brought out the green in your archeology professor’s eyes, and you did a little of this:
Yes, Frank is THAT professor, so start doodling already – those hearts aren’t going to draw themselves!
(okay, okay, there’s the whole “banging the co-eds” thing that isn’t so hot, but I will deal with that in a subsequent post very maturely titled “Yeah, but Claire started it!”)
Gettin’ Bizee
Let’s face it, by the time Jamie brings Claire back to the stones, after an assortment of cattle raids, sexy kilts and waterweed-related incidents, most readers are like “Frank who?” But prior to that, Frank proves himself to be devoted to Claire in some endearing ways. True, he’s not whipping out his sword every 10 minutes to be all warrior-hot, (and by sword I mean “man-member” and by “all warrior-hot” I mean “have sex with Claire”). This is a little more his style:
You senstive little Lloyd-toy!
not so much this:
And although we only get (paltry) glimpses of Frank-Claire sexy bits (as opposed to, like, 8,000 pages of Jamie-on-Claire action), I don’t remember Claire having any complaints. As a matter of fact, she goes commando on an expedition with him expressly to be prepared for Frank-lovin’ anytime, ’cause that’s how he rolls. He’s totally ready to do it ‘al fresco’ at the drop of a sardine tin. And the ‘human breastpump’ and ‘doing it with a pregnant lady in a hospital bed’ incidents prove that he’s not afraid to let his freak flag fly. So contrary to Beth and Bekah’s assumptions here, I think Frank’s more than willing ‘get his knees a little dirty’ with Claire, if you know what I mean. (wink, wink)
Ultimate [history] fan-boy
What do you do if you are a total fanboy, but were born approximately 70 years before Star Wars was released? I mean, what can you possibly nerd-off on? Victrolas? Monocles? Woodrow Wilson? Really, the only sensible choice is to become a history geek. Which is why Frank writes tons of fanfiction (historical texts) about the Rising, goes Defcon-5 (Beth explains here) for Jonathan Wolverton Randall, and probably grew up in this bedroom:
Trust me, if he had been born after 1970, in the previous sentence you could replace “the Rising” with “Firefly” and “Jonathan Wolverton Randall” with “Dr. Who.”
And let’s face it, if you are reading this, you most likely fall on the fanboy end of the spectrum. You may be outraged at the thought that Frank spent his entire second honeymoon indulging his obsession with ancestry texts, leaving Claire to wander the hillsides picking plants and getting sucked into space-time vortices, but admit it: this is roughly akin to what is going to happen to your husband when you suggest a romantic vacation in San Diego next July (24-27 specifically) because San Diego is LOVELY that time of year! Not because there will be any sort of CONvention concerning COMICs. And then you will (accidentally) spend the week chasing down every Outlander panel session and Sirenity reunion gathering, while he lounges at the tepid hotel pool drinking a complimentary watered-down margaritas in the company of a motley assortment of discarded spouses.
Sorry honey, Tom Mison is signing photos in hall C at 2pm. Enjoy your beverage!
Which leads me to the last reason Frank deserves our love:
He is Everyspouse*
Regardless of their personal traits, all of our significant others have something in common with Frank: they all have to share us with Jamie.
Frank’s not thrilled to have to spend a chilly 20 years with a woman who harbors a deep, abiding love for a dead Scotsman. But Frank (my husband) comes to realize that Jamie (a fictional character) is a hot slice of man-cake that Claire (I) could not have possibly resisted, and tries to love Claire (me) the best he can. And, like Frank, my husband sticks with me, even though my phone currently looks like this:
Hello, lovely!
Frankly, Frank deserves better. So let’s raise a glass to the first Mr. Claire, while mentally prepare ourselves for whatever JAMMF bomb Starz is going to detonate into our eyeholes this week! Cheers!
*Save for the ‘banging coeds’ thing
What’s your favorite Frank scene? Just how dirty do you think Frank is willing to get his knees? Which Outlander character is on your phone?
