Quite honestly, deciding what to wear every day is a chore for me. I don’t like putting outfits together, fashion is not something I’m particularly interested in, and I’m not really interested in what’s trendy each season. Despite that disinterest I do try to keep track of new trends, because I like to know what I’ll be seeing in stores for the next few months. I like to be prepared, so if all the new trends are things I have no interest in I know that I have to hold on to all the clothes I have for now and try again next year. Now that it seems the snow is finally finished here on the East Coast we can dig out our clothes for the warmer weather. Of all the trends this year, and there are a lot, I picked out a few that I’ll be willing to wear and some that I won’t absolutely won’t go near. First, the good news:
Asymmetrical neckline
I have a small chest, so I don’t have to worry about what bra I’m going to wear nine times out of ten. If it’s going to be inconvenient I just go without one. For those women that always need to wear one though I can see how this trend would be too much hassle. I wouldn’t bother with anything too over the top, I don’t want to have to consult instructions to get the thing on, but this is a way to add a unique element to a shirt or dress that would otherwise be very simple.
Lavender
Guess which one of these I edited in here…
Millennial pink is still everywhere and has probably bring other pastel colors back into popularity. I’m still iffy on them in general, and I’d gravitate towards a much deeper purple if I had to choose. But in small doses this is a very pretty color.
Black and white polka dots
I love polka dots. They can be a bit cutesy, but I maintain that it’s all about the attitude you wear them with. Carry yourself less like Minnie Mouse and more like Jackie O and you’ll be fine. I’m a small person, so I usually have to keep my dots on the tinier side so that the pattern doesn’t overwhelm me. If you’re tall, take advantage of it and wear the biggest ones you can find.
Puffed shoulders
Some people are going to hate this one, and I get it. Every trend isn’t for every person, but I really love it. The stuff we see on the runway is very exaggerated, but the clothes that actually make it to the stores are a more toned down version, which makes it wearable in real life. A good puffy shoulder makes me feel like I’m the heroine in a regency novel. I may not actually be on my way to a ball in a carriage, but I will sure as hell roll my car window down and pretend that the wind blowing through my hair is scented with horse and the English countryside.
That’s the good news! However, all trends are not created equal, and there are a few that I wouldn’t even want to try to pull off.
Rubber
No. No, no, no, no. Rubber has nothing going for it as material for clothing. It isn’t comfortable, it’s got to be a mess to wash, and I think it looks cheap no matter how you style it. But the fact that this is a trend for warmer months is insane to me. Rubber isn’t exactly the most breathable. Jelly sandals used to be very popular when I was a kid, and they were fun to wear for about 15 minutes until your feet became a slippery sweaty mess. Having that feeling all over my entire body is not appealing.
Fanny packs
I don’t care how inconvenient carrying a bag can be, I will never wear a fanny pack. Ever. If you’re a hipster, go for it, I could definitely see them working with that whole aesthetic. I will never not think they make whoever wears them look like a mom at a theme park in the 80s. I don’t care what it’s made of, or how these designers are trying to glam it up. A fanny pack is a fanny pack and it’s ridiculous.
Transparent
The only time I wore something clear was when I forgot my umbrella on a rainy day at work and turned a giant plastic bag into a poncho by ripping a hole at the top. It was not a good look. Neither is any of this. What’s the point of it being there at all if you can see right through it?
Exposed briefs
“Exposed briefs” is a fancy way of saying “showing your underwear,” which defeats the whole purpose of clothes. Underwear goes under what you wear, hence the name. It’s not supposed to be part of the outfit. Did this trend come into being because someone was tired of being worried about panty lines and said “Screw it, just let it all hang out?” At least this one makes more sense for the summer than the rubber thing.
