Since it’s been almost 25 years since those movies, I’ve hoped for a long time that a new version of The Addams Family was coming. Their quirky obliviousness to reality is always endearing, and at this point almost jealousy inducing. At this point, who among us wouldn’t jump at the chance to live in the blissful bubble that is the Addams mansion? Luckily, there are plans for a new movie! Unluckily, it’s the one that nobody really wants. It’s going to be animated. How quaint.
They’ve dangled the dream in front of us only to immediately snatch it away, like being offered what you think is a chocolate chip cookie, only to take a bite out of it and discover that it’s oatmeal raisin. I have absolutely nothing against animation, but I don’t think it’s the medium a lot of fans were hoping for. There were two animated series in the 70s and the early 90s, and they just don’t feel the same. The decision to go animated for this next go around was made as a kind of homage to the original comics, but as the comics are literally no one’s favorite version of The Addams Family, that’s a bit disappointing. I’m not saying I won’t watch it, but now fans can’t make their dream cast lists and hope for them to come to fruition, which is the best part about beloved titles getting movies. I know Oscar Isaac as Gomez was the favorite for a lot of people, and I can totally see it.
but my personal vote would be for Javier Bardem.
Fan-casting for Morticia is more varied, with Eva Green and Jessica Chastian being popular choices. I’m ride or die for Naomie Harris, who I’m convinced has the absolute perfect vibe.
If you remain unconvinced, watch her in this scene from the James Bond film Skyfall.
Sexy knifeplay is so Mortica Addams. Bonus: Javier Bardem was in Skyfall as well and there are photos of he and Naomie Harris together from various premieres, so we know they look good together.
I could keep going. You know who’d make an unbelievable Wednesday in this dream casted version I’ve come up with? Zendaya. But it’s all for naught, and everyone is going to have to keep on wishing for the next 25 years, because this time around the only thing to get excited over is listening to voices. In a should-be-live-action-but-will-be-animated-instead version of The Addams Family directed by the guy who made that raunchy CGI movie Sausage Party. As if this wretched year hasn’t taken enough from us already, now it can’t even get The Addams Family right. The one truly pure thing in the universe.
Check back in a year when I begrudgingly but inevitably cover this new version of The Addams Family, hoping to be pleasantly surprised and proven wrong. Until then, what’s the most disappointing remake of something you’re a fan of?