It’s probably not the best idea for me to be going around and punching people in real life, so I came up with a list (in no particular order, and pared-down to a manageable size) of fictional characters that I’d like to punch in the face if I could.
Gilderoy Lockhart
Lockhart is far from the worst character in Harry Potter. Voldemort or Umbridge he is not. But this isn’t about who you’d like to get rid of the most, or who you think bad things should happen to, or who is an encapsulation of pure evil. It’s about someone you’d like to punch, and you can want to punch someone for lots of different reasons. In this case, it’s because he’s annoying as hell. We all know a Lockhart.
Scar
Watching The Lion King for the first time was the most traumatic experience of my young life. I still cry every time Mufasa dies, no matter how many times I’ve seen it. This guy is responsible, and deserves to be punched more than any animated lion ever. PETA can suck it.
Hermey the Elf
I argue with my sister about this every Christmas. I get Hermy’s thing. He marches to the beat of his own drummer. He wants to live his own life in his own way while everyone tells him that he should be doing something else. Live those dentistry dreams, man! It’s inspiring and all that crap. The problem is, his voice is so annoying that every time I hear it I wish that I was born without ears. He looks all adorable and then he opens that mouth and I hate him more than anything. He’s getting punched today for sure.
Aldrich Killian
This guy became a Marvel supervillian because Pepper wouldn’t go out with him and Tony was mean to him once at a New Year’s Eve party. He fights his big battle in the movie dressed like your Dad’s golfing buddy. Need I say more?
Donald Trump
I’m including him because I refuse to resign myself that he is an actual person who exists in the world who thinks, says, and does the things that he thinks, says, and does. I genuinely believe that he would never actually be a fictional character, because anyone who tried to write him would be told that he was too unrealistic. I’m not even going to use a real picture of him, so this is photo from a Sesame Street parody where he’s played by Oscar the Grouch.
Which fictional characters would you like to hit on National Punch Day?