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Breaking It Down
Fellow Tom lover Patricia joins T Hiddy Committee to break it down for you clip by clip, but be sure to go to CBS for the full ordeal if the above video gets yanked down by them… because it’s truly worth it to see the whole thing. Like, Tom does this…
“God damn, see you licking frosting from your own hands.” – DNCE
He poses for the photobooth like a pro…
And he’s totally the man behind the curtain…
Hiddle Piddle Diddle Widdle In The Middle of the Night
Jamie: I want to know who made fun of Tom for his name in boarding school. He’s part of one of the biggest movie franchises in recent times and is beloved all over the world, and where are THEY?! Name names Tom. Publicly shame all of them!
Patricia: My husband calls him Tom Middlefinger. I just think he is jealous.
Lorena: Thomas totally shames people here, but Tom is too eloquent for that… he did get a little name droppy in this bit. But it was preceded by the “naughty Thomas” part, so it’s forgivable. My husband just calls him Tom; he’s not jealous. He, like Thomas Middleditch, gets that his wife wants to bang Hiddleston and that’s okay.
Improv Shakespeare, AKA Tom’s Element
Lorena: So pay special attention to Tom’s face at 2:26 right after James Corden says “Like Spring Break”. He does this smile nod thing where you can just actually see the wheels turning and him no longer listening and just waiting until he can speak so he can make his Spring Break improv commentary. It’s like that Graham Norton episode where they’re writing Daniel Radcliffe fan fic and Ricky Gervais is finally just like, “Guys, here’s the three elements you need for a story.” because he’s such a writer it’s impossible for him to not participate.
Jamie: I sincerely hope that Tom ends up doing Middleditch’s show at some point. He came up with that out of nowhere, and was so into it. Because yes Lorena, you can absolutely see it on his face as he’s coming up with it. I’d love to be able to see him be able to expand on it and crush everyone else. He would have fun with it, but it’s Tom and Shakespeare so you know he would be in it to win it.
Patricia: This needs to be a thing! If Middleditch doesn’t jump on this then Corden better. And it better be preserved on the internet forever and ever.
Lorena: Honestly his big hesitation seemed to be the improv part of it. But I’ve seen the man play zip, so I know he’s done troupe exercises (omg I am totally outing myself as someone who did improv)
Jamie: As a side note, I don’t think I’ve ever played a game of Monopoly in my life. We had it, we were just more inclined to play Clue and Dream Phone.
Lorena: My dad is so intense about Monopoly. Even as a kid he would not ever let us win. If you won, you legit won. There’s nothing more satisfactory than beating my dad at Monopoly, my entire family and husband can attest to this.
Simon’s Town Penguin FTW
Lorena: When this leopard is placed into Tom’s arms, he just is done with everything else is basically like, “Me and this leopard and life is better than it was ever before and life is only this moment and this leopard kitten.”
Jamie: I love it when the leopard starts swinging around on his arm! Meanwhile, the one Middleditch has is trying to gnaw off his hand. I don’t know who I’m more jealous of in this scenario: Tom, for getting to be all snuggly wuggly with something so precious. Or the leopard, for getting to nuzzle Tom’s face. Truly a toss up. And the Simba lift at the end!!! Please.
Patricia: Once that leopard starting climbing Tom like a tree, I was done. Like, cuteness overload. But also, so many inappropriate jokes flashed through my head. Summary – we all want to be the kitten.
Lorena: Oh man, I wanted to be Tom, actually. I respect leopards so hard. When the penguin comes out though… everyone’s freaking out and I’m just like, “Oh a Simon’s Town penguin!!!” Because they may love penguins, but I LOVE penguins. There’s a reason I’m a Pittsburgh Penguins fan, people.
Jamie: I LOL’d when Tom phrased it, “I’ve never been this close to a penguin in all my days.” All my days?! Who says things like that? It seems like such a 19th century Southern belle thing to say. Like “Oh my stars!” It may also be English and I’m just not familiar with it.
Lorena: Hehehe! I didn’t even notice that, Jamie! Too much. He’s so English. Seriously though, when he reaches out to pet the penguin, but can’t because he’s holding an endangered leopard kitten escape artist… I can’t even. Like revive me from death by cuteness overload.
Jamie: I’ve pet a penguin before, it was a baby. The outer feathers were smooth, but the feathers underneath were SO soft. Also, does Jack Hanna just have the one presentation that he gives regardless of whether the audience has children in it or not? Because really, asking a group of grown men if they’ve ever heard of the word “monogamy” before? Two out of the three of them are married, I’m pretty sure they’re familiar with it. Fill that time with more animal facts! But he does a lot of good things with his zoo, so he gets a pass.
Lorena: Jack Hanna seemed to have a script with no deviation! But who cares, cute animals! Tom of course quickly had an eloquent response to it. Though, I don’t want Tom to value monogamy given my marital status… you’re on my freebie five list for all of my days, Tom!
We will leave you with this snuggle & classic Tom move
