What your Favorite Holiday Movie Says About You:
A Miracle on 34th Street
If A Miracle on 34th Street is your favorite holiday film you probably also think staying at a Times Square hotel while in New York City is a good idea. Who wouldn’t want to be in the center of it all?! You’ve even considered planning a vacation around the Macy’s Day Thanksgiving Parade. Again, who wouldn’t want to freeze and watch Disney kids lip sync songs while sitting on a street corner that smells like pee?! You probably also grew up participating in pageants, local theater productions and singing solos at Church. Your Real Estate business is just starting to take off and you have your eye on that area Realtor award for most moms sold in your suburb. Your 2.5 children are beautiful and blond and live in your brick mini mansion by the lake.
A Christmas Story
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You love the classics: a sweater from J Crew (not the Tilly), a pair of pearl earrings, Adele on the hi-fi and A Christmas Story on the TV. Even though the jokes can be a little crass and you’d NEVER put a Ceramic Leg Lamp in the front window (it’s an AWARD!) you love the look back at a bygone era, the black and white life of the 50s brought to life on TBS for 24 hours every Christmas. You’ve even combed your little one’s hair like Ralphie and when he needed glasses, which frame did you choose? Yup, Ralphie all the way.
It’s A Wonderful Life
(SWOOON Jimmy Stewart)
If George Bailey rings your bell (an Angel gets it’s wings AND your name is Nikki) you’re probably a little dark and twisty inside. Sometimes the Holidays can make you a little depressed but in the end it’s just because you love Christmas so much and deep down want people to prove your dark Scrooge heart wrong. And they do and your
A Princess For Christmas
If you’ve even seen A Princess for Christmas you’re probably wearing a shirt right now that says “I’m a fan of Diana Gabaldon and the Outlander Series.” You’ve visited Scotland numerous times, you have a picture near the Fraser memorial stone at Culloden and your Christmas scarf is made from the Fraser family tartan (natch). You’ve probably also, already had your regional Outlander Fans group Christmas party wherein you all toasted a “dram” of Scotch in Sam and Cait’s name and wished everyone a “Nollaig Chridheil.” OBVIOUSLY.
Elf
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If you’re favorite holiday movie is Elf you were probably once a Blog girl who wanted to be Zoey Dechanel very very much, right down to the thick bangs that didn’t complement your face. Sorry. You’ve given up the blog in favor of the elementary school carpool and are probably sipping a glass of ice cold Chardonnay while your kiddos watch the movie and you and your mom friend from down the street watch from the kitchen. When Zoey sings Baby It’s Cold Outside you get a little wistful feeling in your heart for what could have been. It’s ok though as you plan your best most jealousy inducing Christmas morning shots that your Instagram husband will have to take.
National Lampoons Christmas Vacation
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If Christmas Vacation is your favorite Holiday movie you have a large extended family, the kind that gets loud around the table, makes the occasional off-color jokes and argues about politics all before the turkey is even on the table. It’s messed up and a tad dysfunctional but like Clark, you love them deep down and you LOVE Christmas. The lights (Clark, are we at the airport?), the cookie making, the present wrapping all of it is just a sign of your favorite season. You might also have a Christmas sweater that says “Shitter’s Full!” with an RV on it.
Love Actually
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If Love Actually is your favorite Holiday movie you probably went to college in the early 00’s and now visit (or own) this website frequently. Upon subsequent, NUMEROUS viewings you’ve gotten good at hiding your love for Daniel and Uncle Jamie (WE HATE UNCLE JAMIE!), the Prime Minister, Bilbo and Rick Grimes and pretty much every other dude in the movie from your significant other who is catching on that no one can take their place. You can recite Colin Firth’s speech in broken Portuguese and tell your friend to keep you informed when she meets her Tindr dates, “JUST IN CASES.” A few week’s ago when director Richard Curtis’ partner tweeted that Harry really did cheat on Karen with that secretary SLOOT you had to call in sick. It was just too much to handle during the holidays. No matter when, now matter what, Joni Mitchell’s song “River” makes you cry and you me, you ARE perfect.
Die Hard
You are awesome.
Krampus
YOU SICK FUCK.
Ok ya’ll! Have a Merry Christmas tomorrow and share your favorite Holiday or Christmas movies in the comments!
