I don’t usually fangirl when it comes to actors. Yes, Tom Mison is a Hot Jesus. Yes, Cumberbatch has a baritone that is almost as effective as the Hitachi. Yes, Jamie Dornan is the reason God invented beards. But none of these facts are enough to make me swoon or follow their chauffeurs on Twitter.
I love Ryan Gosling. Love love love.
According to my calculations, we reached peak Ryan Gosling about two years ago. Hey Girl, he was a meme. Hey Girl, he was thisclose to being named Sexiest Man Alive. Hey Girl, he was in a movie with Mr. George Clooney.
Being past peak Gosling is actually great news because once something isn’t cool anymore, you can start to love it IRONICALLY.
Loving something ironically is fun! It’s totes cool. Loving someone on their way up or at the zenith of their fame can seem…unoriginal. Oh you love Hiddles? Take a number.
But loving Ryan Gosling at this moment makes total sense because he ain’t the It Guy anymore and we know it. It makes us seem self aware. It’s meant to be silly. It’s done with a wink. Now, when we write that fan letter to Ryan, we do it in HELVETICA.
And to be a Ryan Gosling Hipster you need to adorn yourself like one. Let’s buy some Gosling Gear.
Ryan Gosling Earrings
$15
It’s Ryan Gosling. On. Your. Ears. If Piercing Pagoda has stocked these, that store would still be in business at your sad mall.
I gave these to a gal pal recently, and I can vouch for their awesomeness. I can also vouch that my friend has gotten this reaction while wearing them:
These earrings are a great conversation starter. And, the seller (Harts and Stars) ships them in a cute box, so if you are lazy like me, you can just hand them over to the gift recipient without bothering to wrap them.
Ryan Gosling Notepad
$9.95
Those are my actual knees and my very own Ryan Gosling notepad at a work conference last week. They market this thing as a journal, but it’s also great for taking notes on topics like “Horizontal Integration” or “Synergism: Analyze, Strategize, Succeed!”
And Ryan says cute and pithy things when you flip the page!
Hey Girl, I’m Six Sigma Certified in Handshakefulness.
If you have a friend who loves The Gos and still writes longhand? Buy this for them.
Ryan Gosling Leggings
$70
If I were to ever create a wishlist in which my fans (all 3 of you) could buy me stuff? These would be on there. Ryan Gosling leggings! Need! Want.
Dollar to donuts, Gosleggings are very slimming. Just be careful where you put his face.
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