I‘m having motherly instincts for a dancing tree.
*This post might contain spoilers, mostly in cuteness, for Guardians of the Galaxy. I would NOT read this if you haven’t seen the movie and plan on doing so.*
Lemme back up: I have been SO excited for Guardians of the Galaxy since I first heard Chris Pratt was cast, and I have to say: it exceeded my expectations. Dancing deployed at the exact right moments, characters who don’t take themselves too seriously, and just the right amount of Pratt: all around a win.
But that’s not what I want to talk about today, really. I want to talk about Groot.
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Yea, that guy. The talking tree played by Vin Diesel that only has one line. I laughed and laughed when Vin Diesel was cast, as this was the closest Hollywood has gotten to a high school drama production. The tree! In the back! For Vin Diesel!
Little did I know, Groot would become my favorite character. He’s so much more badass than I anticipated, and usually ends up saving the other Guardians’ asses. What I was not expecting was that he has a big heart, and is constantly doing kind and generous things (when he’s not killing people, of course).
Just look at that face! How can you not love that face?!
So I was pretty attached to Groot, by the end of the movie. Then, some things happen, and I was faced with THIS:
BABY GROOT HE IS DANCING WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME I AM FEELING NEW FEELINGS
I think my biological clock just started up for a baby humanoid tree. I’ve gone batsh*t crazy for baby Groot, and have scoured the Internet for ways to has him as my very own.
Marvel does not appear to have an official dancing baby groot that I can buy, which is unfathomable to me. And others, apparently:
Without an opportunity to have Marvel TAKE OUR MONIES, people have started drawing and making their own. The results are…mixed, though I can totally relate to this girl’s caption:
ARRGHHHHHH:
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I really wish I didn’t want this. GOD WHYYY, ESTROGEN, WHYYYY!?!?
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Then, there is Etsy. The people have taken matters into their own hands, Marvel. And you know what? Most of them look like poop. Like actual turds.
This one is sold out already, OBVIOUSLY:
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The only conclusion I have here is that Marvel MUST do this. There’s speculation that they’re working on making dancing baby Groot a reality, and they better come through. My heart bursts when I see this little guy, and I’m having weird motherly instincts for a fictional tree. If you’re anything like me, remember:
Have you seen Guardians of the Galaxy? Do you also want to take care of baby Groot? Tell me I’m not the only one…
