Well, we brought our feelings on what Starz was surprising us with last week, and we were mostly correct … OBVIOUSLY. New trailer debuted on Yahoo TV, but we also got OutlanderCommunity.com which strangely doesn’t feature as much That’s Normal as it should.
So, now that we’ve all seen the new Outlander trailer, what do we think? Me, Nikki and Tiffany got together last night to break it down for you. But first, watch again.
Lilith Fair and Judgement
Beth: Ok yeah. I got some things to talk about
Tiffany: Me toooo
Nikki: First off: TERRIBLE MUSIC. what Sarah McLaughClan and the ASPCA battered puppies weren’t available?
Beth: Was Ellie Goulding just gagging at the chance?
Tiffany: Dont judge me but I sort of like it
Nikki: JUDGING
Beth: DAMMIT TIFF
Tiffany: can’t win them all
Beth: Well I liked Say Something in the If I Stay trailer. I was the only one. Sometimes the cheese stands alone.
Tiffany: I liked it becuase my heart is a jungle you guys
Beth: Took me a couple of listens to hear “my head is jungle” not “junkyard”
Tiffany: but if its head then I can’t relate. my head is a barren land
Beth: It could be heart. I have no idea
Nikki: i didnt hear any of that, just was annoyed
In Which Nikki Makes a Great Analogy and We Fall Into Church Girl Mode
Nikki: i was too busy thinking about how those witch women by the stones look like they’re dancing in the yearly Easter cantata
Tiffany: the dancers remind me of when I used to go to a SUPER pentacostal church with flag dancers during worship
Beth: They are def the Cana wedding feast girls
Nikki: we’ve ALL been in those bathrobe costumes with the dishtowel on our heads
Beth: But you get the fancy flower crown at the Feast of Cana
Nikki:the vessels of water/wine
and someone with some palm fronds
outlander = scottish messiah story
Beth: Oh, it’s totally a Christ story.
Tiffany: ya think?
Nikki: OH DIANA
Beth: DianaG even said it was a little heavy handed in the Jesus imagery, first book
Fun fact: Black Jack’s parents names are Mary and Joseph
Nikki: REALLY?
Tiffany: of course they are
Nikki: #outlanderfacts
Beth: Yes really
I AM A SUPER SLEUTH
Nikki: #supernerd
Tiffany: too bad they birthed the devil
Beth: the nail in the hand. The sacrifice. Jesus was essentially sexually assaulted on good friday. The womb at the end is the tomb etc etc
Nikki: OMG it IS a Jesus story. the dancing makes sense
so who had a not so secret crush on jesus and wanted to do him?
is this blasphemous?
Beth: Kind of a little considering I am hard up for Jamie Fraser
feeling dirty
In Which Fandom is Full of Disgruntled Suckers
Beth: Ok so trailer …. I thought it was kind of cool that this little social media campaign was the actual day Claire disappeared and the trailer was focused on that. KINDA
Tiffany: yeah that was clever
it was super annoying though
I am just lazy
Nikki: very clever with the date. annoying to “unlock” something.
Beth: Fandom was NOT into it
Tiffany: gimme the trailer I dont wanna work for it, I have to work for everything else in life
Beth: at least all the mean bitches that I follow were like UM NO THIS IS LAME, Starz.
Nikki: TN readers probably noticed that we “shared” the video to TN’s wall like 4 times because we were all too embarrassed to put that on our own walls
Beth: haha yes
I think we even all put a little caveat on there “uh, hey, we’re posting this here because … shame”
Nikki: i was also excited because i thought the site was a tumblr but alas it is not
Tiffany: I didn’t share it #badfan
I waited for all you suckers to do the work for me
Nikki: you got us STARZ
BethWE ARE YOUR SLAVES
Nikki: we will post it umpteen times to a page that is vaguely associated with us personally
Not the Sex Scene We’re Looking For, but ok
Nikki: ok can we talk SAM
i mean JAMMF
i mean get in me now. i gotta say i was never that hot for teacher before but now i’m like hELOOOOO
Tiffany: uhh should we talk frank first?
Nikki: frank in a sec cause WHAT?
Tiff: hellloooo knees to the chest
Beth: The knee in the sex scene was my first reaction moment
Tiffany: mine too. girlfriend is flexible
Nikki: WHERE IS THAT?
Tiffany: now nikki is interested
Nikki: i was too busy thinking about turning water into wine apparently
Tiffany: #yoga
Nikki: someone has to take Bekahs spot in these things
Beth: Well, resident perv, in the sex scene with Frank her knee is like HELLO EARS
Which if she’s going with the one knee, then kudos, Frank. That’s a nice position for …things
Tiffany:watch it again nikki
Nikki: going back to watch
TIff: #getitfrank
Beth: #TeamFrank #Franksgotskillz #thatjamiedontb
Nikki: OHHHH i ssee it WOW
no wonder she was trying to get back through those stones
#dickmatized (TM dlisted)
Beth: Oh please, later on in the book Jamie’s dick is Claire’s only emotional motivator. Talk about dickmatized.
Beth: Do we think she will be topless here? not that I want to focus on that but just curious
Tiffany: oh for sure
were gonna see a lot of claire bits
Beth: I just wonder if we are doing to be left with topless only when she’s with jamie
Tiffany: probably see a lot of her butt too since jamie is all all about that azz
Nikki: we’ll probably see from from BEHIND
her BIG ASS
Beth: ASS JINX
Nikki: emphasis on small since she is an ACTRESS … get over it women
Beth: #RelativelyRoundArse
Tiffany: maybe she will have an ass double
to keep things true to the book
Beth: Doesn’t matter. His hands are big. Ass will look not big enough cupped in those hands
Nikki: HELLLOOOO
No one else is into Claire’s Man Pants
Beth: Let’s talk RQ about how Claire is wearing trousers on her stones date with Frank
TROUSERS. So Katherine Hep
Tiffany: she is?
Beth: Just for a second. I love it.
Tiffany: I didn’t even notice
Nikki: didnt see it
clearly i didnt see ANYTHING. i need to turn the brightness up on this thing
Beth: OK FINE
we WONT talk about it
Tiffany: beth sees all
Beth: it’s pretty dark tbh
Nikki: beth – she was so MODERN and ahead of her time so im not shocked
always PUSHING THE BOUNDRIES
pushing with her big azzzzzz
Blah blah blah … MORE JAMIE PLEASE
Tiffany: do you like the narration? at the start of it?
Beth: I like that it’s the prologue, but something sounds off about it
Nikki: yes i liked the narration. good for people who havent read it
Tiffany: I really liked hearing from Claire. she sounds just like imagined.
Nikki: it was nice actually seeing them interact
with actual WORDS and dialogue
Beth: Yes, most definitely, I wish the jump cuts weren’t so obvious though.
Nikki: i just cant wait to hear JESUS H ROOSEVELT CHRIST
Beth: We’ve heard it!
Nikki: WE HAVE?
Tiffany: she said it at that fan gathering. I wasnt even there and I remember it
Nikki: OH YES. geez i was there. i mean IN CONTEXT
Tiffany: She looked super embarrassed when she was asked to say it
Beth: you’re right Nik. I would like it in context. Also a m-effing SASSENACH in context
Nikki: oh yes we will all die when there is a real Sassenach to be had
Beth: Because that means he will be looking at her with all the LURVE.
Tiffany: I can’t wait to hear more accent talk from Jamie!!
Nikki: like i was saying before: JAMIE was finally OMG HOT to me in this
Beth: Yes, this is UNDOUBTEDLY the best that Sam as Jamie has looked HANDS DOWN.
Nikki: he just looks massive
i mean obviously the camer adds ten pounds and angles and whatnot but HELLO NURSE
Tiffany: he looks goog
total transformation into the character
Nikki: SO VERRA MUCH SO
Tiffany: we really havent heard much from him at all
Beth: Well, they’ve only shown us stuff from the first couple of episodes
Which has been my biggest annoyance.
It’s great to see shots and stuff but we could piece together the first 2 eps already
and nothing after
Tiffany: are they done filming yet?
Beth: No
Nikki: are they STILL filming? i ask this because MY FRIEND has some cookies she wants to drop off. JUST A super casual drive by the set
Beth: I think they are truly only about halfway done. Tell your friend I will DM her their address on set
and the address that Sam’s friend accidentally instagramed the other day just in case you want to drop by one of the star’s Glasgow residences. It’s totally cool
TIif: Your Friend, Nik?
Nikki: YES MY FRIEND!!! STOP PUSHING!!!
it’s just a NICE GESTURE
HE LIKES IT!
HAHAHJAYKAY ALL THE LOLZ
Tiffany: when we say cookies are we talking about somthing else?
I never know with you guys
Beth: Cookies are on the real.
BUT OMG CLAIRE IS THE BEST
Beth: Ok so I liked the fact that we saw more of Cait’s emotional range in this trailer.
Like her shock when she gets shot at, despair later, happiness with Frank etc. Hard to pick a favorite moment, but it might be this one:
Tiffany: agreed. I feel like in the book she isnt emotive enough about her situation
Nikki: DEFS
Tiffany: its good that we will be able to see it on her face
Beth: yeah like she describes crying sometimes but isn’t going on an on about being TOTALLY BUMMED and SCARED etc
Nikki: she cant be a grade A badass all time… like you DIANA
Beth: maybe claire IRL cant focus on the deets of mouse turds when she doesn’t know where the eff she is
Tiffany: I am not a huge fan of claire in the books but I have a feeling I am going to have a major crush on her in the show
Beth: that’s interesting tiff. I love her in the books. Now that i’ve reread most of them
Tiffany: I just think she was cast perfectly
Beth: GAH. ME TOO.
Nikki: Claire’s focus is ALSO: ALL THE HERBS
Tiffany: so many herbs
Beth: Also: Jamie’s musculature
Nikki: all the heather
Tiffany: and tarten shawl
Nikki: hey look a CLAVICLE … WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!?!?!
Beth: All the bad looks from leghair
But really … back to Jamie
Beth: How about the fact that I can’t really understand Jamie
Nikki: ME TOO
Tiffany: what? I can
Beth: LIke I didn’t think it would be this hard
THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID
Nikki: #SCOTTISH
Beth: but it is
Tiffany: I dig that accent hard you guys
Nikki: and im sure he’s softening it for our american audiences
Beth: Grrrrreat.
Nikki: me too. SO manly
Beth: Does he say “were he not alive” or “are he not alive” bc neither of those things makes sense
but what he DOESN’T say is “IS he not alive?” which would
Tiffany: thats what I heard “is he not alive?”
Beth: He does NOT say IS
if he does then his accent makes no sense
maybe he says IS but Sarah McLaughlin is too loud
Nikki: i trust it’s hot and scottish
Tiffany: and him raking the hay?
is that what he is doing raking it?
Nikki: THE HAY!
and the horse riding. something so confident about that
Tiffany: he can rake my hay anyday you guys
Beth: He can rake your hay, I’ll take the horse ride.
Nikki: i think i died a tiny death during the “you may not be scared so long as im with you… and when you’re not with me?” part.
Beth: AHHHHhhh yes. It was a good little glimpse. AGAIN, if the cuts hadn’t been choppy as hell.
That’s the first like real sweet scene between them
the one that starts their intimacy off
Nikki: yes. finally
i dont know how i’ll be able to watch this in a room with other people. might be too embarassing with my sighs and whines and whatnot
a lot of swooning
Beth: I’m thinking about crying right now
Tiffany: I will not watch this with others
Nikki: defs some ugly crying when he leaves her at the stones
Beth: Look, I cried when Sam was cast. AND ADMITTED IT ONLINE
so I’m pretty solid on being an embarrasing mess
Tiffany: #ladyhormones
Nikki: #estrogen
claire could tell us which herbs would help with these feelings
Which Fangirls Did Diana Name the Tavern Wenches After?
Beth: Claire would hate all of us
Nikki: HAAHAHA
Beth: we are all the tavern wenches from Dragonfly. I bet in her head Diana named the tavern wenches after some of the thirsty homemakers who first wrote her supercomputer email
Tiffany: hahahaa
Nikki: cause we’re trying to get all up ONS
Beth: trying to get under Jamie’s kilt
with our mouths and stuff
Nikki: ons and under
Tiffany: dont hate the playa hate the game claire
Nikki : move over claire.
get your BIG ARSE outta the way
Beth: I’d totally scheme like Laoghaire
she’s the REAL badass of Outlander
#unpopularopinion
Nikki: and beaaauuuuttiful
Tiffany: except she gets fat later on #reallife
Nikki: HAHAHAHA
like all the cheerleaders/popular girls from high school
just consult facebook
Tiffany: totally peaks in highschool
glad I was awkward in high school
Nikki: ME TOO
HIGH FIVE FOR BEING HOT NOW
Beth: HECK YES
Tiffany: killin it in our 30’s
Beth: Hive five for not tanning in high school #AllMyFriendsAreLeatherFace
Tiffany: suck it leghairs of the world
Nikki: ew i dont want to suck any leghairs
Who’s Giving Handjobs When?
Beth: What scene do we think it is when Jamie is saying “be careful?”
Tiffany: I thought it would be before she tries to escape
Beth: Yeah, IDK. They look like they’re at Leoch
Maybe after they’re married and he’s leaving to go on the hunt with the pedophile duke
Tiffany: thats what I thought
Nikki: i think so
Beth: I just can’t belive they gave us a post-wedding tidbit
Nikki: people in the REAL world don’t know that though, right?
Tiffany: there is a real quick flash that looks like its from the wedding night in there
Nikki: WHAT?! where
Beth: I think he looks too dirty. SIDENOTE: UUUUUUNNNFFFF.
Beth: I hope it’s not the wedding.
maybe that’s when he takes Leghair’s beating
and Claire goes to him to check his injuries/give him a handjob
Tiffany: does that really happen?
I dont remember that
Beth: hahah no. you REALLY haven’t read in awhile
Nikki: a real quick handy always makes you feel better
Tiffany: handjobs are never memorable though…
It’s been almost a year, you guys!
Nikki: Since you read it, or since your last handjob??
Tiffany: I told you they are never very memorable.
Nikki: Well, its a lotta wrist work #carpaltunnel
Beth: Leghair gives Jamie a handy in the alcove
Nikki: Ew.
Tiffany: no way. she hardly would do it with him when they were married
Beth: Yeah, but she was trying to TRAP him back then. She was totally on her way to being the girl who gets pregnant just to get married.
Beth: That’s what I am gonna ask Diana next time I see her: how far did Jamie and Leghair go in the alcove?
Third base?
Nikki: Diana probably already wrote it as a novella and it’s buried in that office
Beth: Her office is part Rev Wakefield’s study, part Claire’s surgery
Nikki: HAHAHA
We Go Veruca Salt on Starz
Tiffany: wait we didn’t talk about the bullshit no release date
“coming this summer”
Beth: Serioulsy. I’ve seen shows with July 2014 dates lately on HBO etc.
WHERE IS THIS DATE
Tiffany: what is happening? why dont they know isnt this suppopsed to be huge?
Nikki: if they push till late fall…. I DONT EVEN KNOW
all the grandmas will be PISSED
Tiffany: Summer is like in a few weeks
Beth: I mean it’s going to be starz’s lynchpin show
if they can’t get more subscriptions with this, then idek
Beth: I can’t handle that wait. I need to know bc … vacations and stuff
Nikki: maybe when MOBY comes out?
Hashtag Summary
Beth: Jamie’s swoopy kilt X a million
Tiffany: #kneestochest
Beth: ONE KNEE #goodstimulation
Nikki: #dianasofficeisatrap
Beth: #BethCantUnderstandSam
Nikki: #alltheClairefeels
Beth: #ClairesTHEbest
#WeAreALLLaoghaire
Nikki: #accent
Tiffany: #giveusadate
Nikki: #NOW
Beth: #IMMEDIATELY
Nikki: #YESTERDAY
Tiffany: #myheartisajungle
Beth: #MyHopeISaJunkyward
Nikki: #myheadisajumble
Beth: #EasterCantata
Nikki: wtf ARE they saying!
Tiffany: all of those things
Nikki: we need #AskAhdamah on that one
Beth: That’s the hashtag we are ending on, right there.
So, there it is, ladies. The Vanity Fair Style Breakdown of the Disappearance Trailer. Any thoughts on when that US AIR DATE is gonna come our way? We will offer tavern wench type things for it.
EDIT: Check out this great new behind the scenes look at the production that aired online ET Canada. Thanks to outlander italy for uploading it!
