This was immediately apparent when we got to the bookstore a bit early. When the owner found out we were there for the signing, she asked where we were from. When I told her, she just gaped at me. Truly, she gaped.
“That’s a long drive.”
“I’m an unapologetic fangirl,” I answered with a shrug.
She looked at me like I was crazy. And maybe I am. All that driving to go to a book signing isn’t something normal 32-year-old women do. But you know what? I enjoy being me, fangirl quirks and all.
Socially Acceptable Fandoms
The whole experience got me thinking. What are “acceptable” things to be obsessed with?
I came up with a short list:
- Sports
Can I admit that a lot of sports fans drive me crazy? I know that this is because I grew up (and still live in) my hometown, where there’s a D1 school with a great basketball team. And what bothers me is not that my 75% of my city is either elated or devastated based on how the team played in their previous game/tournament/season. It’s that the 75% that are obsessed with the team flood Facebook with live updates about the games, making my wall SO BORING on game days. (This is one of the many reasons I’ve switched to Twitter lately.) Additionally, that 75% looks at me like I’m missing essential neural connections in my brain when I tell them I’m not into sports and have no idea who’s on the team this year. - Fitness
Everyone likes to brag about how far they’ve run, how much weight they lift, or what their new workout routine is doing for their bodies. And if you hate to work out, you either feel guilty or suck it up and do it anyway (like me). - Music
But only certain bands: iconic ones (U2, The Beatles, etc.) or bands that straddle the line between commercial and indie (Mumford & Sons, Ed Sheeran, etc.). Heaven forbid you admit to liking Taylor Swift or One Direction.
The list of socially acceptable obsessions gets a little longer if you’re female:
- Fashion/Makeup/Hairstyles
I’m obsessed with my hair. I don’t care in the least about the other two. - Your kids
I love my daughter more than my own life, I promise. But while parenting small children is physical and emotional, intellectually, it’s depravity. I don’t think women in groups should pretend they are childless, but in my opinion, talking about our kids for more than few stories starts to feel like an hour-long conversation about the weather. It gets painful.
what is up with this spacing?
Fringe Fandoms
Then there are the fringe fandoms:
- The comic book/Star Trek/Star Wars/video gamers group
They’re considered geeky, but demand begrudging respect for the general brilliance of their crowd. - Artists
Culturally, people expect artists to be slightly left of center. So whatever their obsessions, people attribute it to their artistic personalities.
source
Which Leaves the Rest of Us…
So the rest of us have two choices: pretend to be “normal” or own our eccentricities.
I pass no judgement on those who choose the first option. I’ve often thought my life would be a lot easier if I could blend in a little better, even if all I was doing was becoming a better actress. But here’s the thing: I find “normal” people boring. I don’t care what people are obsessed with (comics, Sherlock, boy bands, etc.), being passionate about something makes you interesting.
Case and point: My husband is passionate about research. He will read online reviews about which food processor/DVD player/light bulb we should buy. I love that about him, because it’s his quirks that make him interesting. Also, since he has peculiarities of his own, he accepts mine. And drives me 7 hours round-trip to go meet authors.
Since you’re here, I assume you have your fangirl/fanboy moments. What are you obsessed with lately? Do you own your inner geek or do you keep that part of your life private?
