Breaking Down the STARZ Outlander Trailer

We apologize.  We promised a break down when we got back from the STARZ Outlander Fan Event, but apparently we were taking too long if the tweets we were getting the past couple of days mean anything. But we get it: it’s been almost a week and half since we all saw the gloriousness that is Caitriona Balfe in person on screen as Claire Beauchamp (omg I just noticed that both initials are CB; my 12 year old self is having a hard time not screaming MTB!!!) and HOW HAVE WE NOT TALKED ABOUT THIS YET?!?!?! Our only defense is that we were figuratively slain seeing it the first time, and couldn’t speak. Breath knocked out of us by its perfection. Sam has yet to come to Memphis or Philly to revive us with mouth to mouth, so we’ve just been floundering around our lives, unable to speak until just now.

Really we’ve been busy. BUT, Bekah and I got our stuff together and hastily hopped on a live hangout last night to break it down face to face. Macbook screen to Macbook screen. From our bedrooms to yours. Bad end-of-day hair, make-up slid off the face and everything. You’re welcome.

You can watch the whole REAL QUICK (by quick we mean less than 20 minutes, which IS about 3/8ths of the length of one of our regular videos) LIVE breakdown here.

 

But here are the HIGHLIGHTS:

0:01 We have literally no idea when a hangout video goes live. Sometimes this is evident on Beth’s derp face.

1:35 First impressions of the trailer: sweaty hands, sweaty pits, sweaty eyeballs … or were those tears? Ok, they were tears.

3:11 UM, imagine the trailer here, and not just Bekah’s face for the next 50 seconds. We really did watch the trailer. We thought you were watching it with us too. Err, not so much. Bekah does an awesome shoulder dance around 3:30, so it’s worth watching just for that. Or you can watch it yourself.

4:00 Trailer is over. We have dopey smiles on our faces, and I am HELLA FLUSHED. Why exactly? SUBSCRIBE if you’re second-hand embarrassed.

4:44 THIS MOMENT. We learn a lot. Like how to pronounce, “Tulach Ard!” and that Jamie is yelling “Tulach Ard!” and that Claire is on the ground in the back so Something Important is happening. Also, I know how to pronounce Murtagh. YESSSS. But omg, Jamie is protecting her already. Except from all those horse hooves about to trample her, but whatever. FIRST JAMIE SIGHTING.

6:00 IS IS DAY OR NIGHT? We have no idea. It looks like day to me, looks like night to Bekah. Obviously, our screens are not synchronized at the same brightness levels. Our conclusion: it’s misty dusk. And it doesn’t really matter.

6:31 Goosebumps and goofy smiles, every time, you guys.

7:17 We do a little sleuthing to see if we can see Geillis. (It’s SO much easier to type their names than it is to say them. Whew. *hugs keyboard and internet anonymity*) Like blink and you miss her, here.

7:50 Bekah talks about nakedness and I immediately wonder if I missed some JAMMF naked time. But instead, she’s talking about who Claire is telling that she’s “fallen through time” and she does a bang up impression of Caitriona’s accent. And basically, we have a huge fangirl talk about how perfect Caitriona is, and how ridiculously happy we are that THIS IS SO OBVIOUSLY CLAIRE’S STORY.

 

10:10  Claire and Frank!!! We are not at all conflicted at how awesome and sweet and sexy Frank and Claire seem together. So.Much.Frank. OMG. Bring it on.

11:35 Bekah gets a French to English translation lesson in Beauchamp. We can’t blame her … #winetrance

13:08 We get down to the BEST part of the trailer. Let’s be honest. It’s this. THIS.

OH MAH GAH. It’s so intimate and ung, and she’s not looking at him, so he’s not hiding how “bonny” her touch is feeling on his collar bone and his UnderTheKiltFeelings are showing and excuse me. I’ll be back in a minute.

15:10 Which OF COURSE leads us directly into a conversation about our beds, what we have in our beds, and how Bekah has Pocket Jamie right next to her.

15:57 WHY can’t we have the show now? I mean, seriously, production people. Move it along. NEED. Ok, take your time, but in the meantime, release the 4 minute sizzle reel so we can have more JAMMF gif opportunities. Like these:

Remember when we broke down the first picture of Claire and Jamie and basically all I wanted was to see a gif of them together on horseback?

If only we could see his face enjoying that “lovely, broad arse wedged between his thighs.” BUT OH WELL.

THANK YOU, TRAILER. You were epic and perfect.

You know who else was perfect? THIS GAL.

OMG GET HERE, SUMMER.

I need to use more caps to show I feel. Hope you enjoyed this silliest of break downs. We cannot WAIT for more. Tell us what your favorite part of the trailer was in the comments.

gif source   gif source