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First of all, what is Duluth Trading Company? Where did this company come from? Is it supposed to be like LL Bean with Tim Kaine’s sense of humor? Is it like Carhart but with higher quality cotton? Is it for white people who wear faux-Timberlands but the real deal are too “urban”?
Duluth Trading Company loves to advertise on my favorite channel Bravo, which is how I discovered them. What goes well with the sequins, rosé, and fake titties of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? Underwear for fat guys! #synergy
Some of the products Duluth Trading sells:
The Duluth commercials for men are cartoons and narrated by Foghorn Leghorn’s older brother, Dale. The ads are intended to be funny, with double-entendres about your low hangin’ nut sack. Guffaw.
The Duluth commercials for women are overly earnest and romanticized, aimed at outdoorsy chicks who hike in Yosemite, throwing horseshoes, and going to dive bars while wearing beige and clogs.
Are you a lady who likes to wear a tank top that covers your muffin top while you press apples for your artisanal hard cider? Do you haul kegs from the local craft brewery because you love a fresh IPA? Or are you a lady lumberjack who chops down trees, alone deep in the woods because fuck safety?! And fuck safety glasses, too!
Commercials are commercials. They are trying to sell you something. Girl power ads are nothing new, and the best ones running right now are those from Secret Deodorant. Kick ass while dealing with stinky pits! I see these commercials and think, It me.
Let’s not mince words: I hate the woman who does the voiceover for the lady ads. Let’s call her…Ruth. I hate Ruth’s voice, I hate her inflections, I hate her accent. I hate Ruth.
Does Ruth have this vocal fry for real? Or did she watch The Bachelor for research? Did Ruth hear Landon from Southern Charm and think, “This anchorless whiner sounds like a winner.” Nothing like hawking Keen’s (aka the ugliest sandal/shoe on the planet) in your lower register.
Her delivery is languorous. Because when you are selling your wares from Big Sky Country, you cannot hurry. I think the recording studio offered Ruth edibles to loosen things up. Time stood still for Ruth, and she became one with the No-Yank Cami.
Ruth’s accent confounds me. It’s sorta country, but it’s from no place. It’s forced. Maybe it’s eastern Maryland. “Hi my name is Ruth, and I’m from McHenry. How do I prep for my Duluth ads? I smoke Winston Ultra Lights while watching Cold Mountain.”
Can someone tell the Duluth Trading lady that she needs to spread gravel in her flannel, not gargle it?
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