I mean winter Christmas break. (Take that, politically correct. I call this my vacation attitude.)
For a teacher, Christmas break is our time for at least two glorious weeks to do whatever the hell we want. No standards, no meetings, no grading (okay, some grading).
Now before you give me your soapbox stance on how teachers have it easy with two weeks off for Christmas, one week off for Easter and a whole summer off, remember this: be in a room with a minimum 30 children, ages ranging from 3-18, 5 days a week for at least 7 hours per day; adhere to standards you still need a roadmap to follow; create completely new daily lesson plans that meet those standards; answer parent emails about why their golden child only earned a 95% on a test and not an A+; have people who are considered “experts” tell you how to teach even though they haven’t been in a classroom since they allowed women to attend public education; and to top that all off: you can’t go to the bathroom anytime you want.
So, I’m going to unabashedly proclaim that yes, teachers deserve those breaks. But the question remains: what to do during those brief days of freedom? Here’s a few suggestions from one teacher to another on how to have the ultimate Christmas break:
Christmas Break Wish #1: Sleep
Guess what, fellow teachers? People sometimes sleep past 5:30 in the morning on Mondays. Remember those days? And sometimes, they don’t go directly to bed after watching NBC Nightly News.
You can now be one of these people. Enjoy it and try not to dream about being late to school and arriving to class naked.
Christmas Break Wish #2: More Starbucks
I know what you’re thinking: But Julie, I get Starbucks everyday on my way to school. They practically have my drink waiting for me with a barista standing in the parking lot ready to hand me my drink.
I’ve been there and I get it. But this break, you’re going to do the unbelievable: you’re going to go into Starbucks, order a drink, and sit down at one of the tables. (Try to find a table that’s not populated by hipsters, talking about their views on America’s middle class and using phrases like, “on fleek.” We get it: you took a political science class in college. Get over it.)
And to top it all off: get another drink. You, rebel.
This Christmas break, the “yours” means your stomach.
Christmas Break Wish #3: Nature Calls
Remember why you couldn’t splurge on that second cup of Starbucks during the school year? At least 183 days of your year requires you to have a bladder of steel and monitor your water intake. Your kidneys hate you, BTW.
I wish.
These two weeks? Give your bladder the gift of relief any damn time you want.
Go crazy. You deserve it.
Christmas Break Wish #4: Let the Binge Begin
Chances are you have a television in either your living room or your bedroom. And if you’re a teacher, chances are you’ve rarely turned that TV on in the past four months. (And if you did, it was to stream a TED talk about lesson engagement or you accidentally sat on the remote while grading papers.)
(And yes, if you were wondering, I have a favorite TED talk.)
So, this break it’s time: binge on all those shows that have taken residence in your DVR since August and you’ve been delicately warned “Will be deleted soon.” (Hey, AT&T! You’re not the boss of me…JK. Don’t cancel my services.)
You know all those Netflix shows everyone talks about? It’s your turn to be the critic. Rev up that first season and watch until your couch gets an imprint of your ass. Of course, everyone else is onto the third season, but whatever, that doesn’t count. What counts is you’re watching television and it’s fantastic!
Christmas Break Wish #5: For all of you teachers out there, have a great and relaxing Christmas break! You deserve it! See you at Starbucks!
Are you a teacher? What are you doing this break? (Don’t say grading.) Let us know! And guess what? You can comment in your pajamas at 9 in the morning! Welcome to vacation!
