All I can say about Monday Night’s episode of The Bachelor is AY DIOS MIO. Spoiler alert:
JUAN PABLO AND CLARE HAD SEX IN THE OCEAN. Also, can we now refer to sex as “time in the ocean?” Who couldn’t use some more time in the ocean #amiright?
Tonight’s episode of the bachelor brought SO MANY EMOTIONS. The end proved this true when there were real Venezuelan tears running down Juan Pablo’s face at the rose ceremony. Talk about a roller coaster.
Clare Clare Clare. I have so many mixed feelings. I like her and I don’t like her. Using the words from Dog Lover (also known as Kelly- I am kind of sad she went home) Clare knows what she wants and is going to get it. Can we hate her for that? Yes, we can, but should we?
Clare likes to steal all of Juan Pablo’s attention. While the other girls seem to play “fair” by not taking too much of his time when other girls are waiting, Clare pounces on every opportunity to be next to him, talk to him and make-out him. Can we blame her? Not really (especially about the make-out part)! I’m sure I would be annoyed too if I were one of the other girls, but Clare knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to put herself out there to get it. And guess what. It seems to be working for her. She got the rose on the group date AND had sexy time with JP in the ocean. Sounds like a double win to me.
BUT Juan Pablo seemed to have some remorse about their time in the ocean. It was consensual. He didn’t hesitate for a second when she asked him to go for a swim. But then I felt like it was Christian college all over again. The “we need to have a talk, we went too far” conversation approached at the worst time ever. Yep, sounds about right.
Unfortunately, the word “douche” was used to describe my man JP in my group text convo with the bffs (rule #1 of surviving an episode of The Bachelor: always live text the episode with your best friends). Juan Pablo later told Clare that he shouldn’t have had the sex because he felt it wasn’t setting a good example for his daughter. Ok, yes, that makes sense. BUT, don’t make Clare feel like it was HER fault that you had consensual sex, which is exactly what happened. No one forced you, except maybe the wAvEs of LoVe (get it?) Just because you feel guilty about what you did doesn’t mean you should make her feel like a skank. I felt bad for Clare. She was so embarrassed and hurt. He could’ve picked a better time to talk to her about it or tried clarifying his feelings better.
Do you think it was Juan Pablo’s intention of making Clare feel bad about having consensual sex in the ocean? I like to think not, because, well, it’s Juan Pablo. I think some of the words he chooses to use when expressing his feelings come off as a little odd to us. Maybe he really feels that way, or maybe he has trouble expressing his feelings in English. (Side note: true story. 5 minutes ago I got a Facebook chat from a guy I met while traveling in Nicaragua. He doesn’t speak English but tries from time to time. The message said “Hi babysitter.” Uhhh what? Pretty sure that’s not what you meant to call me). HOWEVER, we live in a society that is pre-disposed to defending men and blaming women for sexual acts and I REFUSE to participate in that. JP can go around making out with every girl there but Clare should feel bad about having sex with the guy she’s dating? I don’t think so. Maybe it wasn’t the best decision on both of their parts, but Juan Pablo shouldn’t get away with making her feel bad for his guilty conscious. Sorry dude #douchemove (except I’m not sorry.)
So, where does that leave us? I DON’T KNOW. I’m confused. This season has felt somewhat of a game of “who can make out with Juan Pablo the most.” Not too much conversation but a lot of tonsil hockey. He has incredible sex appeal. He looks like an awesome kisser. He seems to not have much self control in that department (HELLO CAMILA). I am looking forward to seeing the rest of the season and will draw my conclusions about him then.
Nikki referenced pooping her pants for the 2nd time during the season. Is it weird that this kind of makes me like her more? I feel like only confident people can talk about such things on national television.
Juan Pablo couldn’t say the word “pediatric.” It was funny. Remember when he couldn’t say “yodel?”
What did you think about Monday night’s episode?
Rachael would like you to ignore the fact that she grew up in the middle of Mennonite-ville Pennsylvania and focus on the fact that she’s Latin-American at heart. From food to dancing to the boys (duh), Rach loves Latin culture. She has spent time living in both Bolivia and Costa Rica & currently resides in the City of Brotherly Love (Philadelphia). She loves cats and loves to run (just don’t ask where she’s going if she veers off the road while running) Also her sister runs this site & therefore wrote this bio for her.